Why We Overthink and 8 Ways to Stop Overthinking
“I overthink everything.”
“That’s me overanalyzing what happened.”
“How do I stop thinking about this person / situation so much?”
“What’s the best way to stop thinking about this all the time??”
Does any of that sound familiar? One of the most symptoms reported to me is “overthinking.” So, if you experience this, you are definitely not alone.
We overthink for numerous reasons:
It has become a habit.
It can be a result of anxiety, stress, or perfectionism.
It can become a reason to procrastinate or avoid something.
It can be a learned response from having to deal with difficult situations early in life.
Like anxiety, it can also be an indication of a creative brain.
Overthinking is often the result of an underlying need that isn’t being addressed. When we think about it this way, it can become easier to help reduce this habit. Find some suggestions below:
Become an observer of your thoughts and know that thoughts are neutral.
This is a mindfulness technique that encourages you to be aware of your thoughts but also to let them pass by, to remember that thoughts are just thoughts. This helps you to know that your thoughts don’t mean anything deeper about who you are.
Thoughts are neutral; they are not good nor bad. Our perception is what turns them into good or bad thoughts. By remaining a neutral observer, it helps thoughts hold less power over us and often helps the thoughts occur less frequently or intensely.
Use your stress and anxiety management skills on a consistent and regular basis, such as:
Mindfulness
Write in a journal
Grounding techniques
Spend 30 minutes outside daily
Move your body for 30 minutes daily
Challenge your thoughts.
Redirect and reframe thoughts that are causing you distress, such as instead of “what is something bad happens?” think “what if that doesn’t happen” or “what if everything turns out okay?” Because, more often than not, the worst case scenarios that our brain creates do not actually happen.
A mental health professional can help you learn other ways to challenge and reframe your thinking patterns.
Implement control.
As mentioned above, one reason for overthinking can be related to dealing with difficult situations at young ages. Situations in early life are often out of our control, so we are left to sit with our thoughts and fears about what is going on around us. This can lead us to believe that thinking and thinking and thinking about something gives us more control, but this is not true. Thinking about something will not get us out of a difficult situation and, instead, often leads to more stress or anxiety.
Find small ways to have control in your life. This may be by creating a structured daily routine, scheduling time for self-care, or saying “no” to things you do not want to do more frequently.
Address underlying perfectionism or procrastination tendencies.
Schedule time to think.
Consider spending a set amount of time each day to think. Start small with a time frame that you feel is doable for you. This may be 30 minutes daily or 1 hour daily, depending on where you are at currently. After you do this for one week, try reducing the amount of time that you allow for thinking, and continue to do this each week. By limiting the amount of time, it can help change the habit of overthinking.
Whenever possible, shift your focus to solutions.
As you probably know, being stuck in a thought cycle is frustrating and not helpful, especially when there are no solutions in sight. If you notice that you are frequently thinking about something, pause and take a moment to think about whether this is productive. Without a solution, the answer is probably no. Spend no more than 5 minutes thinking of a solution. If you’ve come up with one, great! Find something new to do or focus on. If you haven’t come up with a solution in those 5 minutes (there won’t always be a solution), it is still a good time to find something new to do or focus on.
Find healthy creative outlets, such as drawing, painting, music, etc.
You can even try singing your thoughts to the tune of ‘Happy Birthday’ or any other song you know.
The next time you find yourself overthinking something try one or more of these techniques. When you do, you might just find that you’re able to find relief and have the thoughts less frequently and less intensely.